Running to Rome
I feel the need to preface what I am going to say with a brief apology to those about to be blindsided. Outside of my wife and my parents, very few people in my immediate circle have been aware of this journey, I believe I can count them on one hand. It is not because I don’t value the input and admonishment of others, but because I wanted to walk this road on my own and follow the guidance of my Heavenly Father through the Holy Spirit with as few distractions as possible. The words below are the fruit of a very personal process that I have played close to the chest, so to anyone who feels excluded I am truly sorry.
I have been a protestant for 20 years of my life. I was born into my faith, and my parents raised me in it. At some point (and only God knows when) that faith became my own. I took responsibility for it, for my relationship with the Creator of the universe. At four years of age, I prayed the sinner’s prayer, and I have prayed innumerable times since for the forgiveness that only comes from the wounds of Jesus. Protestantism is to me, what an accent is to anyone, you can tell where they come from by listening.
Around December of 2018, I felt the faintest itch on my soul to explore, shrugging it off at first. While I was never taught animosity towards Catholics, I supposed that I knew they were heretical in their thinking. Mary-worshiping, superstitious, abusive, to name a few issues. The main thing I knew, though, was that they hated Protestants. I had darkened the doors of a Catholic church once, for a concert. Even then I felt like the undercover spy, and assumed that if I had been “outed” as a Protestant I would have been doused with Holy Water as crosses (with a tiny Jesus on them, mind you) were held up to me, and parishioners chanted Latin to “deliver” me.
So what was my first step on this journey? Bumper stickers. Around January 2019 was the first time that I remember feeling the need to confront Catholicism for myself. Why? I still don’t know. I didn’t have any plans to confront Catholics, to tell them they were wrong, nor did I have any plans to “join up.” I can’t honestly describe what I felt, but I knew it was the Holy Spirit. This draw to Catholicism was not from me; it wasn’t anything my brain had manufactured; it was from outside of myself.
At any rate, bumper stickers. Catholic radio bumper stickers. As I’m experiencing this, leading to learning more, I recalled seeing bumper stickers for a Catholic radio station. There’s a great thing about radio, especially on a morning commute, alone, in the car; Nobody can judge you for listening to it.
What I expected to hear was some Gregorian chants, a lot of Latin, countless Hail Marys, and all those other superstitious things. In reality, what I heard though, was a call-in show. The host, Patrick Madrid, took questions from an audience of Catholic, and Non-Catholic listeners, and he talked about the issues of the day (abortion and social problems). It was incredibly informative, and I haven’t regretted turning the dial. I started browsing the internet and getting answers to my questions, this earnest research commenced around the beginning of Lent, and for the first time, I chose to participate in my “protestant lent.” I swore off Instagram for 40 days and instead decided to spend the time I would on that app in prayer, and of course, study.
What was a rosary other than a mystical item that had supernatural powers? What was with the whole not eating meat on Fridays thing? Did Catholics honestly believe that the Pope was incapable of being wrong? Why did the Catholic Church teach that Mary was always a virgin when scripture said Jesus had brothers and sisters?
With these questions, came answers, shockingly reasonable answers at that. Slowly I began to take the next step; I wanted more than just what I could find on the internet. Nicole and I attended a mass, both agreeing it was “interesting” and confusing. Can we get a roadmap for what we’re supposed to say? When am I supposed to kneel? That was a charming little gospel message, but where are the three points to take away? Also, poor things couldn’t even spring for some stadium seating; those pews are hard. It’s important to say that I didn’t experience anything that I could walk away with and say it was “wrong” or offended my protestant sensibilities, but it was new, one might even say weird.
Still, I had done it; I had sat in a pew (and stood, and knelt) and participated in the mass. I felt like I needed further answers, and it only brought up more questions. By this point, I had noticed that if I had a question, it usually had a reasonable explanation, so I wanted to get more answers. I found that there was indeed a program for people in my situation, RCIA, the Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults. I went to RCIA, stopped attending when I felt I was getting some push-back from those close to me, and then resumed RCIA again when I couldn’t deny that God himself was telling me to go. As I wrestled with what I was being told, and what my preconceptions were time continued onward.
Now, in the fifth year of this journey, this weekend I celebrated the most momentous Mass I’ve been able to attend. I was welcomed into the Catholic Church and I am in full communion with Rome. I do not disavow my protestant upbringing, or any pastor I have ever sat under. Instead, this acceptance of Catholicism is to me the fulfillment of all that has come before.
I wanted to share some of the main dominos that fell for this transformation to happen, the realizations that convinced me to be Catholic. This is by no means an extensive list, and seeing as how this has been a long journey with many stops and starts please don’t expect an exhaustive explanation.
The Catholic Church is the Church Christ Founded
Historical Primacy
The Catholic Church is the only church that can claim to have been founded by Christ personally. Every other denomination traces its lineage back to a person such as Martin Luther, John Wesley, Ellen G. White, or Chuck Smith. The Church in Rome traces its lineage back to Jesus, appointing Peter as the first pope followed by 265 others. This line of popes has continued unbroken for almost 2,000 years.
[Mat 16:16–19 ESV] Simon Peter replied, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.” And Jesus answered him, “Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jonah! For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my Father who is in heaven. And I tell you, you are Peter, and on this rock, I will build my church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it. I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.”
Jesus put an earthly human being in charge of other earthly human beings to share his gospel and bring the world into a relationship with him. How much more amazing that he chose Peter, who would deny him.
[Jhn 21:15–17 ESV] When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” He said to him, “Feed my lambs.” He said to him a second time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” He said to him, “Tend my sheep.” He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” Peter was grieved because he said to him the third time, “Do you love me?” and he said to him, “Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my sheep.”
Sola Scriptura isn’t Scriptural
Where did all these books come from?
To start with, let’s define terms. Sola Scriptura is a doctrinal statement that the sole source for authority in faith and practice is the 66 books of the reformed Bible. (More on that in a minute). “Where is that in the Bible?!” I have cried on many occasions when confronted with a doctrine or belief. Sure there might be nice things that traditions can teach us, but if you can’t prove it by looking in the Bible, it must not be true… Right?
Wouldn’t this be an easier situation if as Christ was ascending into heaven, the apostles looked down and where His feet had left the ground there was a scroll with everything we need to know about being Christians? Sure it would, but in His omniscience, Jesus chose not to do that. Instead:
[Jhn 20:19–23 ESV] On the evening of that day, the first day of the week, the doors being locked where the disciples were for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said to them, “Peace be with you.” When he had said this, he showed them his hands and his side. Then the disciples were glad when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, even so, I am sending you.” And when he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you withhold forgiveness from any, it is withheld.”
Could it be possible that Jesus saw fit not to leave behind an organizational chart, or manual because he had already put a structure in place, one that would be filled with broken humans for sure, but humans who were strengthened by the Holy Spirit?
What about the role of tradition in the life of the believer? Let’s turn again to scripture itself:
[2Th 2:15 ESV] So then, brothers, stand firm and hold to the traditions that you were taught by us, either by our spoken word or by our letter.
“Hold it,” you may say, “Tradition is nice and all, but councils, Church fathers, traditions, statements of faith, a pastor’s teaching, they are only valid if their source is scripture.”
Again, let’s go back to scripture:
[1Ti 3:14–15 ESV] I hope to come to you soon, but I am writing these things to you so that, if I delay, you may know how one ought to behave in the household of God, which is the church of the living God, a pillar and buttress of the truth.
What is a pillar and buttress of the truth? The Church. Which Church? The only one there was, the one founded by Christ, entrusted to the Apostles.
Even then, where does our canon come from? Scholars, both Catholic and Protestant, agree that the third Council of Carthage in A.D. 397 “closed the book” on the debate as to which books were scripture, and which books were not. Which church held that council? The only one there was, the one founded by Christ, entrusted to the Apostles.
Jesus Christ is Truly Present in The Eucharist
His Body fuels The Body
Possibly the most scandalous thing I am going to say in this entire essay is this: The Communion that the Catholic Church offers at every Mass is, in substance and miraculously, The ACTUAL Body and The ACTUAL Blood of Christ.
[Jhn 6:53–55, 60–62, 66 ESV (Shortened for Emphasis)] So Jesus said to them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. Whoever feeds on my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day. For my flesh is true food, and my blood is true drink. … When many of his disciples heard it, they said, “This is a hard saying; who can listen to it?” But Jesus, knowing in himself that his disciples were grumbling about this, said to them, “Do you take offense at this? Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? … After this many of his disciples turned back and no longer walked with him.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is not a parable, this is not hyperbole. If it had been a parable, John surely would’ve told us so and would have revealed the hidden meaning behind these words. If it had been hyperbole, Jesus would have softened his statement in verse 61, but instead, He doubles down, challenging his audience. Many of his disciples no longer walk with him, they turn away because what says is not symbolic, but literal.
The protestant “Lord’s Supper” is figurative, a nice symbol. The Catholic Eucharist is, in substance, the Body and Blood of Jesus Christ. This for me was the final straw, this is the reason I had to become Catholic. Instead of a symbol, a shadow of the real thing, I have the opportunity to partake of Christ fully.
Conclusion
At Home in Rome
So where do we go from here? I’m sure no doubt that I may have created many questions for you to wrestle with, not in regards to your faith, but how on earth I could make this change in mine. If you want to have a conversation, I’m more than willing. If you want to pray for me to leave the Catholic Church, by all means, I invite you to; I just ask that you not lose faith when it doesn’t happen. This has been a years-long process and not a quick decision. There’s bound to be some things I’m fuzzy on, so for any lack of clarity in what I’ve written, I take full blame. I’m different today, but I feel that I’m more a Christian today than at any other point in my life (something we should all be able to say). If you fear I’m no longer “saved” let me tell you what I believe:
I believe in God, the Father Almighty, Creator of Heaven and earth; and in Jesus Christ, His only Son Our Lord, who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died, and was buried. He descended into Hell; the third day He rose again from the dead; He ascended into Heaven, and sits at the right hand of God, the Father almighty; from there He will come to judge the living and the dead. I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy Catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body, and life everlasting.
